When it comes to sex, not all positions are created equal. And by that I mean certain acts and toys and positions that are a blast for one gender, are a pain in the butt (sometimes literally) for the other. Some of the positions that give women stimulation in all the right places do nothing for men. And some of the sex positions that drive men crazy leave women with sore joints, rug rashes, or worse, feeling absolutely nothing at all. So let’s just be honest: here are eight sex positions that men love that are awkward for women.
Bent over in the shower
Shower sex always seems like a good idea at first–you’re both already naked and wet, and you can be as loud as you want under the running water. Then you can’t find a safe position that won’t cause you to slip, so you always revert to the you-turned-around-bent-over position.
We are drowning down here!
Men don’t realize that we have water rushing down our nostrils, in our mouth, and in our eyes. If they don’t hurry it up, we will drown.
Reverse cowgirl gives him a great view, and it gives you a lot of control. Plus, when you’re turned around the two of you experience more friction.
Staring into the void
He has a view of your lovely arched back and your butt, and you have a view of…the wall? The neighbors? We have nothing to look at in this position and can end up tuning out.
Doggy style is another position that gives him a great view. And when your body is at a 90-degree angle he can achieve deep penetration.
Our knees hurt
We can really only handle this position for a minute or two because it puts a lot of pressure on our knees. If our knees slip outwards during it, we can face a pulled muscle.
Aaaww spooning is so cute! He can breathe on your neck, bite your ear and hold your stomach.
We have to lift our leg
But for spooning to become sex, we have to lift our leg up towards the sky like a dog relieving itself.
In this position, he is in a chair, and you are sitting on him, facing away. It’s like a lap dance but with intercourse. What’s not to love? (For the guy).
We have to seriously use our leg muscles to bounce up and down in this position, and we have very little room to do so since our feet are planted on the ground.
For this position you get into plank position and raise your butt towards the air, and your partner gets behind you. It’s a great angle for both of you but…
Your elbows are almost the only thing holding you up and you’re pressing them into the bed over and over again. They’re raw when it’s all over.
Eyes to the sky
You get into reverse cowgirl to start this position. Next you bend backwards so your back is touching your man’s stomach.
We’re weight conscious
How are we supposed to enjoy ourselves when we know we are putting our entire body weight on our partner? Yeah–that won’t make us self conscious at all.
Anything on our knees
As a general rule, anything that puts us on our knees is going to give us a leg cramp after two minutes.